Christmas in April: ‘Twas the night before last minute shipping deadlines…. (eTail Insights #6)
Saturday, April 11, 2009 at 6:43PM See if you can guess the month this was originally written for. It's a toughie...
It's almost the day we've been planning since June
It's scary! It's here! It's almost too soon!
It's been weeks since new site tweaks, we're all feeling sober,
Site code has been frozen since early October.
Budgets have flown off like southern-bound birds;
Marketing blew big bucks on Google adwords.
On PayPal! on EChecks! on Rotating Credit!
On digital cash! online wallet! on cards that are Debit!
We pray "O today, let economic crisis be averted!
Help us to get lots of sessions converted!'
Let's go, online traffic! Mirrored servers, get mounting!
Our metrics are waiting for clicks to be counting!
We're watching! We're counting projected sales versus actual!
and assessing right now if SEO was all natural!
New shoppers arrive--on promos to pounce!
But, do they have pause when creating accounts?
Are savings enough? Did their nerves you assuage?
Or do they just bounce right off your home page?
Are you safe and secure? Will new customers have a conniption...
if they find out they're shopping sans SSL encryption?
Do you have enough AJAX? And commerce that's social?
What about in-store pickup at a location that's local?
Are you lucky? Are workers each other a'tripping,
as they scramble past robots whilst pack-pick-and-shipping?
Are fulfillment centers buzzing in overtime glee
as you get out them gifties--ontime under trees?
And what of next year? What new things are coming?
To keep your business in recession still humming?
What happens next time in things click-and-mortar,
when next we all face our first thru fourth quarters?
We'll be dashing and prancing to start-of-year conferences
to talk about new ideas on personalizing preferences.
We'll watch and pretend it's much more than jive
when a panel convenes on 'web-two-point-five.'
Don't get too anxious! Too scared all will fail!
Don't cheapen your brands with huge clearance sales!
Seriously, are we behaving like a whole bunch of rookies,
Making poor Santa ask if HE can leave cookies?
Treat all shoppers nice, for it is just decency
that is the thing that will jump visit frequency.
Great customer experience is all in the details...
else they'll be dying to opt out of emails.
It's not about platforms, or templates, or what's new
it's about doing for customers what others won't d.
The tiniest customer will loudly agree:
Be nice, make me happy, and back I will be!
My wish it is this: may your site bring you gold
May all of your holiday wishes end up 'bove the fold.
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